I did it!!!!

So, for anyone who is interested, I lived up to my week long write everyday challenge.  Well, I missed the following Monday, but I think I made up for it.  I didn't actually write anymore of my books but I did revise some previous blog posts and, wait for it, submitted them to a couple of local magazines. 

4 years people.  It has taken me 4 years to step out and try to get myself published.  I wrote my query.  I sent my articles.  And I waited.  For a whole day.  That's all it took for one of the magazines to contact me.  Going from there, I proposed a few article ideas and THEY WANT ME TO WRITE SOMETHING FOR THEM!!!!  Woot and Woot again.  I'm pretty sure I won't be getting financial payment but I could care less.  I'm going to be published...in February of 2013.  Sure, that's several months away.  Sure, they could get my articles and say they suck and refuse to publish them.  But for today, I am not going to focus on the negative could-be in this scenario.  I am going to be excited about taking a leap of faith.  I am going to congratulate myself on doing something and not just thinking about doing something.

So, if there is something you have been dreaming about doing.  Quit dreaming and do something about it.  That is much easier said than done.  I know this.  I've lived it for my entire life.  But it feels pretty good to take action.  It feels even better to have been validated. 

The Organic Revelation

Today I was making food for the loin fruit.  Dicing, chopping, and boiling away.  Then came my least favorite part:  peeling.  I do not peel most things I give him but I do peel apples.  It isn't like this is a difficult task.  I just don't enjoy it.  I often find my mind wandering as I peel and here are a few thoughts from today:

•   I wish I could have an apple tree in my backyard
•  Wouldn't it be cool to be able to peel an apple with one long fluid stroke of a knife.  This led me to the Wild West and a man with a big mustache and a leather outfit.  Not the trashy kind.  But rugged and made from the skin of a cow that he, the cowboy, killed and then used every part of for food, clothing, and shelter.  This led me to the big knife must wear on his person so that he can peel said apple.
• I want a knife solely for the purpose of peeling apples.

The apples I was using to make apple sauce for the loin fruit were organic.  They weren't pretty.  In  fact, visually compared to other apples you probably wouldn't choose them.  They weren't shiny.  The weren't excessively large.  They were quiet and still.  They didn't scream.  That's when the next thought came to me. The thought that stayed with me more than the cowboy knife apple excursion was this:

People are a lot like produce.

Some people are like produce grown with pesticides.  

They look really beautiful.  They have shiny exteriors.  They are coated in wax to protect themselves.

You'd pick them out of a crowd.  And you wouldn't ever get to know them.

But they aren't real.

Others are like fruits and vegetables grown organically. 

They soak up whats given to them and gift us with their reality.  

They don't sparkle in the traditional sense.  They are raw and mushy.

You might think they look different.

But they are real.

Don't mistake this as any sort of judgement on any type of person.  My observation showed me that I'd rather be like those organic apples than the pretty ones I always buy in the store.  I would choose these because I know what's in them.  There isn't any guesswork.  I don't have to pretend.  I would rather be that than the alternative.  Hiding behind a sparkly exterior because I don't know what's really going on inside of me.

I still like sparkly apples.

But it takes courage to be raw and mushy. 

To all you mushy folks out there.  I hold my cowboy knife high and salute you.

 

Self Challenge

After a thought provoking conversation with Dr. P and a relaxing weekend in the Keys, I have decided that I am going to declare myself a writer...this is huge folks.  In case you did not know, I've spent the better part of the last 3 years thinking about writing.  I've taken several classes and done lots of research.  Oh how I love research.  Research allows your academic self to kick into overdrive without actually committing to anything. 

I am sick of the nothing.

By God, I am a writer.  I believe I was created to create.  I have done so for as long as I can remember in varying capacities.  I have seen my plays be performed.  I've been published in academic journals (fun fact, I have a very academic side).  Now I want to move forward and be published in magazines and eventually see my middle grade fiction novel come to life.

I write my blog as practice.  Dr. P says that perhaps my blog is a way to avoid taking the step towards publication by putting my work out there for people to see and judge.  I want to deny this but the fact is it is true.  I am afraid of failure.  The sure fire way to avoid rejection is to keep your ideas locked in a closet.  I don't want to stay in the closet anymore.

I am tired of practicing my life.  I want to live it.

So I am putting it out there:  I AM A WRITER. 

I will still keep writing in this blog because it is helping me develop discipline.  The stakes are low but they do exist.  So now we come to the SELF-CHALLENGE portion of the discussion.  I have several ideas to write about over the next week and I am going to do so.  Everyday.  Sunday, today, until next Sunday I will be writing.  Don't expect your mind to be blown.  This is a practice in diligence for me and hopefully a way to stay connected to people as well.  I have learned that I am not good at connecting.  I am sorry.  Honest words on a page come easier for me than face to face ones.  Hopefully I will get there.  Until then, here we are.

See you Tomorrow.